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The steady bombardment of messages that we receive each day has led our era to be dubbed the Information Age. The sheer volume and clutter of these messages make it difficult for any single message to get through clearly and with IMPACT. For parents trying to fight through the competing VALUES and beliefs represented in this barrage in order to stake a beachhead in their children's minds, the task CAN be overwhelming. Yet we persevere knowing that the battle for our children's minds is the challenge we ACCEPT when we become parents. If we are lucky, our children will ask us questions that give us OPPORTUNITIES to help them make positive value-oriented interpretation of this COMPLEX world. Yet, these questions are often the stuff that can make a parent's face turn red and her knuckles turn white.

What do you say to a seven-year old who asks about sex? How can you help a twelve-year old who is struggling through the divorce of his parents? And perhaps most important of all, how do you get through to your child about all those matters that they think about, but NEVER ask you about, like the teenager wondering about her first beer? All too often we subscribe to the outdated NOTION that "no news is good news". We mistakenly believe that if our children are doing okay in school and NOT getting into trouble, then all is well. We feel confident that our rules and our discipline are SUFFICIENT deterrents to the misbehaviour and harm that we know is lurking. Yet are our kids safe?

Are our children safe from societies that have forsaken MORALS and VALUES for the sake of freedom of choice? Are our children safe from the increasing number of pedophiles that seek to snatch away their innocence? Are our children safe from peer pressures to conform to immoral, violent, or unhealthy behaviours like sex, aggressiveness, smoking, bulimia and anorexia? Are children safe from family members who expose them to prostitution in Asia and Eastern Europe, pornography in Western Europe and Americas, and wars in Africa and Middle East? Are children safe from parents who abuse them physically, emotionally, and even sexually? Are children safe from parents who selfishly neglect them, and knowingly or unknowingly expose them to the acts of sinful nature listed in Galatians 5:19: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, etc. ARE OUR CHILDREN SAFE? If there was ever a time that ABLE and WILLING parents NEED to unite, develop and implement EFFECTIVE strategies to protect children, it is NOW! According to Graça Machel, in her 1996 report on the impact of armed conflict on children, "We cannot waste our PRECIOUS children. Not another one, not another day. It is long past time for us to act on their behalf - the impact of conflict on children is everyone's responsibility and it must be everyone's concern. Power and greed can never be an excuse for sacrificing children; in tolerating this scourge of war against children, every one of us becomes complicit in the violence and harm inflicted upon them." And Kofi Annan added, "Only as we move closer to realizing the rights of all children will countries move closer to their goals of development and peace".

In one of his articles, George A. Boyd reminded us that, "In a healthy family system, family members openly acknowledge their problems, discuss them openly, and work toward change. They believe change is acceptable, and actively solicit workable solutions from other family members. Children in these families are free to express their needs and wants. Family members can talk about feelings and traits in themselves that they feel should be changed: shame and embarrassment do not immobilize them. There is permission to express appropriate anger. The adults of the family model healthy, congruent behaviour for their children: what they tell their children to do and what they themselves do, match. The function of a family is to provide the following needs for their members: Maintenance - the provision of food, clothes, shelter, and health care; Nurturance - the granting of safety, security, warmth, and a sense of 'home'; Inclusion - the fulfilling of love and belongingness needs; Privacy - respect for each member's autonomy and separateness; Esteem - the bestowing of a sense of worth and personal value on its members; Understanding - the agreed upon right of members to make mistakes, and learn from the mistakes; Recreation - the opportunity to have fun together; and Spirituality - the permission to develop a relationship with a Higher Power, to have meaning and purpose in life".





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Therefore, without a doubt, the neglect and abuse of children ARE crimes against GOD and against humanity - similar to the massacre of the Jews by Hitler's forces, and the hauling of African into slavery by the western world. We should convict ourselves for being part of a society that willingly spend billions of dollars to wage wars over already depleting natural resources like petrol and diamond when we could spend WAY less money to ensure that children, who are the real natural resources, are accorded basic necessities like food, water, housing and parental care. For United Nations statistics indicates that out of the 2.2 billion children in the world today, 1.9 billion live in developing countries, while 1 billion, which is basically every other child, live in poverty. Other statistics indicates that annually in the United States alone, one million girls between ages 15 and 19 become pregnant, and half of these pregnancies end up in abortion; 3 million teenagers are infected with sexually transmitted diseases; 40% of children live in a single-parent home; 10% of adolescent boys and 18% of adolescent girls have made some attempt to take their own life; and the average child witnesses 8,000 murders and 100,000 other acts of violence on television by the time he finishes elementary school. Everyday in the U.S., 13 young people commit suicide, 16 are murdered, 1,000 become mothers, 2,200 drop out of school, 500 begin using drugs, 1,000 begin drinking alcohol, 3,500 are assaulted, 630 are robbed, and 80 are raped; and though relative to the population of each country, these statistics are really NO different from other societies.

With that said, some of us parents are actually FORTUNATE to have our children with us; and most importantly, we ARE fortunate for willing to practice EFFECTIVE parenting by INVESTING the necessary time and effort to ensure that our children are well prepared to face a dying world, make godly decisions, and live lives of IMPACT. As parents, our most important job is to be a PARENT. It is also our most tedious and REWARDING job; that is if we practice EFFECTIVE parenting. Out of the 3 most challenging HUMAN responsibilities, which are Marriage, Parenting and Spirituality, parenting is the TASK that requires the largest amount of TIME, CARE and COMMITMENT, due to the ABSOLUTE vulnerability of children. Though in ALL things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his PURPOSE, we have the DELICATE freedom to MOULD our children in ways that could either end up to be detrimental to their FUTURE, or hopefully, instrumental in helping them BUILD a foundation that withstands the imminent storms in life. The reason that our societies are FILLED with children who know no better than self-centredness, hatred, disrespect, laziness, immorality, wickedness and violence is because parenting as GOD intended it to be has been extinguished in the homes of many; and this is also due to the laziness, upbringing and pride of their parents - thus creating a vicious circle that can only be broken by those with The REAL Desire to Make Things HAPPEN in their families. The GOOD news is that there are STILL parents, who, like MANY married couples today, STILL believe in parenting as God intended it to be. As stated in Psalm 127:3, we STRONGLY believe that "Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from HIM". And NOT to CARE for them in ways that are PLEASING to GOD is a sacrilege!

Parenting can be summed up in one word; influencing, which is all about making it easy for other people (our children) to convince themselves to accept our point of view. It is about gathering enough information to effectively help others involved (our children) make the appropriate decisions aligned with a strategic purpose or set of values. According to a study by the Harvard University, there are 5 main competencies of influencing: Interpersonal Awareness; Critical Information Seeking; Concern for Impact; Rational Persuasion; and Strategic Influencing. To be an EFFECTIVE parent, you MUST be well-equipped to influence your children to make godly decisions, change their opinions, and modify their own behaviour, while cultivating a shared pool of meaning in your household. And to EQUIP you for this EXHILARATING mission, we at The Exhortation World Outreach have developed a Parenting Program called The GPS of Parenting, which could be easily implemented in the households of those with The REAL Desire to take their parenting and family to GREATER heights.





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Parenting can be summed up in one word; influencing, which is all about making it easy for other people (our children) to convince themselves to accept our point of view. It is about gathering enough information to effectively help others involved (our children) make the appropriate decisions aligned with a strategic purpose or set of values. According to a study by the Harvard University, there are 5 main competencies of influencing: Interpersonal Awareness; Critical Information Seeking; Concern for Impact; Rational Persuasion; and Strategic Influencing. To be an EFFECTIVE parent, you MUST be well-equipped to influence your children to make godly decisions, change their opinions, and modify their own behaviour, while cultivating a shared pool of meaning in your household. And to EQUIP you for this EXHILARATING mission, we at The Exhortation World Outreach have developed a Parenting Program called The GPS of Parenting, which could be easily implemented in the households of those with The REAL Desire to take their parenting and family to GREATER heights.A GPS (Global Positioning System) is a navigational satellite developed to provide precise positional and velocity data and global time synchronization for air, sea, and land travel. Similarly, The GPS of Parenting provides precise positional information regarding your parenting so you may swiftly make the necessary changes to your own behaviours in order to effectively influence your children. It is designed to simplify the numerous requirements for EFFECTIVE parenting into 6 clear, concise steps - all beginning with a 'P'. It prompts you to establish a PURPOSE for your household, indicates ways to influence your children to adopt values that are aligned with the purpose, and finally, presents ways to fill the knowledge and encouragement tanks of your children, while submitting to God who is the ultimate source of strength for ALL. Though focused on parenting, the methodology of The GPS of Parenting is similar to the popular 6 Sigma, which is a system of practices originally adopted by Motorola in 1986 to systematically improve processes by eliminating defects, thus resulting in a US$17 billion saving within the first 20 years of practice. You may NOT end up saving US$17 billion in the first 20 years of practicing The GPS of Parenting, but you WILL be saving yourself and your children from so much agony. In the words of James Dean, "I can't change the direction of the winds, but I can set my sails to reach my direction". Now, this is what The GPS of Parenting was designed to do.

The implementation of this program REQUIRES the participation of your spouse, if married, and most importantly, the participation of your children, especially if above the age of 6. Like I told a parent who came to me after one of these parenting workshops, it is NEVER too late to attempt being the parent God CALLS us to be. The parent told me the son was already 20 years old, and I told him to IMMEDIATELY start practicing steps 4, 5 and 6, as an impetus for coming back to steps 1, 2 and 3. The GPS of Parenting requires PERSONAL commitment and accountability, as well as a consistent review of progress, preferably with another couple on the same program. You will be REQUIRED to "PREACH what you (already) PRACTICE", and "watch your life and doctrine closely". For according to Jesus Christ in Matthew 7:3-5, "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." In other words, "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your children's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your child, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your children's eye."

Dear parents, please join me to "examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the LORD". In the words of Elizabeth Stone, "Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body". For more information (written/Audio CD) about this program, how to properly use the attached workbook to implement The GPS of Parenting in your household, or to REGISTER for the next Parenting Workshop, please email alex.ihama@TheExhortation.com, or visit our website, www.TheExhortation.com. You may also request to have The GPS of Parenting presented to your church congregation, or any other friendly or communal gathering of parents by sending an email to alex.ihama@TheExhortation.com.



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- Kong Fuzi (Confucius) 551 BC – 479 BC

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While you may forward this on to inspire others too, your feedback means a lot to me. alex.ihama@theexhortation.com