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In our New Year message, "Making Things HAPPEN", we used the analogy of a vehicle to describe the 5-step process of how some people ACCOMPLISH way much more than others; and the 4th step was that they always "Tighten Loose Ends". Loose Ends are those minor unresolved problems or difficulties, especially the final details preceding the completion of something significant; they are the last few details that need to be taken care of in order for something to be complete. A perfect example is seen in the famous conversation between a rich young ruler and Jesus Christ in Matthew 19: 16-30. Yes, the rich young ruler had amazingly kept the Ten Commandments, but according to Jesus, "One thing you still lack; go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth. That was his Loose End; for though he wanted to be perfect, he could not imagine giving up his wealth and personal desires.

According to Confucius, the legendary Chinese philosopher, "The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools." This is so true; however, in a fast-paced environment like today, sharpening our (life) tools before using them is NOT often the norm. Though many people are fortunate enough to be physically whole, with functioning brains, minds, eyes, ears, mouth, tongue, hands, legs, etc, they make NO effort to sharpen these tools in order to be more effective. These fortunate people respond without first listening; leap without first looking, even in dangerous moves like crossing busy streets; write without first learning; and most detrimental to relationships, speak without first thinking.

We are quick to sharpen the tools we need to perfect our garden, BUT not the tools needed to 'Live a Life of IMPACT', 'Foster EFFECTIVE Communications', 'Build FULFILLING Relationships', 'Maintain a Work/Life BALANCE' or 'Make Things HAPPEN'. Regardless of the behaviours that make us seem nonchalant at times, every human being HAS the innermost desire to Live a Life of IMPACT.

While some are yet to make the ULTIMATE Decision to actually do so, only a few of those who have made this decision are truly doing so. Many more have made the ULTIMATE Decision, but yet to develop the habit of consistently tightening their Loose Ends. This is the difference between those who Make Things HAPPEN and those who often wonder what happened. Those who are yet to make the ULTIMATE Decision are the onlookers who watch things happen.

Another example of a Loose End that is common in marriages and other relationships is the act of formulating responses in your head when your partner is STILL speaking (instead of ACTIVELY listening). Similarly, your Loose End may be that you often (rudely) interrupt your spouse to emphasize your point, while he or she is still speaking. My friend, regardless of how committed you may claim (or believe yourself) to be, a Loose End like this will hinder your personal growth, and potentially ruin your marriage and relationships if it is not being consistently tightened. Proverbs 18:13 says, "He who gives an answer before he hears - that is his folly and his shame". The main root causes of Loose Ends are Upbringing, Laziness and Pride; so humbly choose the root cause of your Loose Ends and then take the necessary actions to deal with it accordingly. We are an organization that is COMMITTED to providing the KNOWLEDGE and ENCOURAGEMENT that WILL help you CHANGE, GROW and BLOSSOM; contact us if you require assistance to determine and/or tighten your Loose Ends.

Okay, presuming that the act of attentively and non-judgmentally listening to someone without inwardly preparing a response to the information while it is been transmitted, is NOT one of your Loose Ends, what is? Ask yourself what you think Jesus Christ would say that you STILL lack? Could it be that you are remarkably defensive with feedback, even though you claim to truly desire personal growth? Could it be unhealthy habits like smoking or eating too much junk food, even though you claim to desire exulting health and wellness? While someone may NOT necessarily be a lazy person, he may often procrastinate in his responsibilities, like the need to respond to his own voicemails and emails. Many people desire Enhanced Personality, Effective Leadership, Energized Marriage, Equipped Parenting, Enlivened Relationships, Enriched Spirituality, Empowered Career, Exhilarating Business, Elating Finances, Exulting Health and Wellness, and an Exciting Life-Purpose, BUT will NOT make the effort to attend a free seminar or read a self-help book - even a free newsletter like this!

Where economically feasible, we would rather be attended to by the best doctors, lawyers, accountants, salespeople, teachers, managers, employees, etc, as well as own the best houses, cars, clothing and all the things we naively consider to be the best things in life; however, we knowingly or unknowingly suppress the godly thought of making the effort necessary to be the best person, leader, spouse, parent, friend, student, teacher, employee, manager and Christian. In the words of Vincent Lombardi, "The quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavour". So, how much effort are you putting into becoming the best version of yourself or the best in what you do? How much effort are you putting into building a harmonious family or a blissful marriage? How would your close friends and family members rate your effort on a scale of one to ten? What does your boss think? If unsure, ask them; for Tiger's effort in golfing is no question.





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For your perusal, I am sharing a table of my Life Goals, the corresponding godly EXHORTATIONS, and some of the actions required to tighten the associated/potential Loose Ends. While I seek feedback from my Running Wife and amazing children on a regular basis, I am open to yours as well, especially if you know me well enough.

TABLE OF EFFECTIVE LIVING
#	Life Goals	The Exhortations	Actions to Tighten Loose Ends
1	Enhanced Personality	Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. (Ecclesiastes 12:21)	Pursue wisdom, knowledge and understanding through reading, learning, workshops, productive interactions, etc. Accept feedback/don't be defensive.
2	Effective Leadership	If anyone wants to be the first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all. (Mark 9:35)	Refrain from being authoritative and demanding. Take the time to develop others; e.g. delegate, coach, mentor, exhort, encourage, follow-up, etc. Be kind, patient, understanding and forgiving.
3	Energized Marriage	Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:21,33)	Spend a lot of quality time together - a lot. Don't be self-focused/selfish. Be respectful, e.g. listening attentively without interrupting or not displaying rude body language.
4	Equipped Parenting	Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4)	Spend a lot of quality time together - a lot. Provide more of their needs, than their wants. Be remarkably involved in your child's life, e.g., activities in home, school, church and sports.
5	Enlivened Relationships	Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:4)	Take the time to reach out to friends and family.· Promptly respond to your phone/email messages. Don't be self-focused/selfish. Encourage and exhort when necessary/required
6	Enriched Spirituality	Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with your entire mind; and love your neighbour as yourself. (Matthew 22:36)	Read the Bible consistently. Attend church continuously, and don't arrive late. Hangout with spiritual people regularly. Always share your faith with others/be hospitable.
7	Empowered Career	Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. (Colossians 3:23)	Refrain from having expectations of others. Serve (work) wholeheartedly. Be remarkably proactive, prepared and diligent.
8	Exhilarating Business	The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty. (Proverbs 21:5)	Be godly - NOT shrewd. Make informed decisions and adhere to plans. Seek advice from experienced people. Refrain from hasty/uninformed decisions and purchases.
9	Elating Finances
10	Exulting Health & Wellness	Do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God. (Romans 6:12)	Perform regular physical/ mental exercises. Eat healthy meals/ refrain from junk food. Refrain from smoking, excessive drinking, etc. Refrain from too much worry, anxiety, anger, etc. Complete a medical check-up at least once a year.
11	Exciting Life-Purpose	Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. (Philippians 4:4)	Control/minimize your worries, especially about inevitable circumstances. Be godly and content/not worldly, e.g. envy, gossip, malice, hatred, revenge, unforgiving, etc.

"Loose Ends are like loose shoe laces; they will always hinder your walk and run until you take the time to tie them".





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While it is ALWAYS easier to list the Loose Ends of those around us, we EXHORT you to take the time to HUMBLY determine the Loose Ends that YOU need to (consistently) tighten in other to CONTINUOUSLY enhance your own personality, energize your marriage, equip your parenting and enrich your spirituality. We say 'consistently' because in most cases, and just like shoe laces, tightened Loose Ends often become loose again; especially if we are not persistent enough to permanently turnaround our detrimental habits. As a Life Coach who works with numerous people around the world, I believe that a lot of people REALLY do BELIEVE in the DIVINE POWER Within; they do CULTIVATE the REAL Desire; and they do PURSUE What MATTERS Most. However, they FALL short in their diligence, integrity, dependability, accountability, and responsiveness. This is why Hamilton Holt once said that "Nothing worthwhile comes easily. Half effort does not produce half results, it produces no results!"

Other common Loose Ends are smoking, when you have no desire to die prematurely; hanging in smoking areas when you desire to quit smoking; indulging in coarse jokes and foul language when you would rather that your children refrain from them; being timid, despite the innermost desire to Making Things HAPPEN in your life; eating too much, when you desire a more comfortable body weight; not taking the time to read self-help books, when you fully agree that learning is An ACUTE Imperative!. My friend, "A man's ways seem right to him, but the Lord weighs the heart. To do what is right and just is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice" (Proverbs 21:2-3). If you wish to take your marriage to a higher level, request for my article, "Why Marriages Fail"; and if you wish to take your parenting to a higher level, request for our program, "The GPS of Parenting".

Personally, I am determined to live my life in such a way that when my friends and families think of integrity, they think of me. I will continue to seek and accept feedback from friends and families as gifts. Since it is the root of an exciting life purpose, I will make every effort to enhance my spirituality by reading the Bible consistently, attending church regularly, and hanging out with spiritual friends continuously. I will be known as someone who does not indulge in coarse jokes and foul language; someone who exemplifies the fact that spending quality time with family and friends is instrumental in having enlivened relationships and harmonious family. Like Jesus Christ, I am determined to be the change that I desire to see in this world and also willing to help many people be the change they desire to see around them.

My friend, an added bonus is that as you tighten the Loose End of one of your Life Goals, there WILL be progress in other areas of your life as well. Take the act of being defensive for example, which is a known Loose End in our desire to maintain enlivened relationships; as you grow in humility by willing to listen to constructive feedback, you WILL become more effective in other Life Goals as well. In fact, those around you like your spouse and children will also benefit from your growth; and perhaps, GROW as well!

In the words of Aristotle, "we are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit". And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.





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My friend, our effort is REFLECTIVE of our hearts, and if we do NOT put 100% of our HEART into the implementation of our GOALS, we will FALL short. In the words of Hamilton Holt, "Nothing worthwhile comes easily. Half effort does not produce half results, it produces no results! What are your Loose Ends that may hinder the accomplishments of your goals and desires? My friend, when we are slow to RESPOND to a job posting, slow to PAY our bills, and slow to give the REQUIRED attention to the little things that matter the most in Making Things HAPPEN in our lives, we often don't go very FAR in Making Things Happen - and that is if we make any PROGRESS at all. If you intend quitting smoking, don't hang around smokers; and if you intend ENHANCING your marriage, parenting and spirituality, then INVEST the required time, while periodically ASKING your spouse and children if they require MORE of your time! BEWARE of complaining, making excuses and blaming others, which are the Loose Ends MOST people are struggling with in today's society. To learn more about character traits that you SHOULD beware of, refer to Your Newsletter of Encouragement on www.TheExhortation.com, and click on The Outbreak.

And by the way, to continue with our analogy of the vehicle, to Tighten Loose End means to be diligent enough to leave home with a MAP, full gas tank, sufficient engine oil, and FUNCTIONING seat belts, head lights, indicators, etc, as well as a cell phone, which MAY not necessarily be part of the vehicle, but CRUCIAL to Tighten Loose End on a rollercoaster journey like LIFE. According to the Proverbs, "The plans of the diligent lead to PROFIT as surely as haste lead to poverty. If you are WISE, your wisdom WILL reward you; if you are a mocker, you alone WILL suffer". One of Your Newsletter of Encouragement in 2007 will focus more on how to Tighten Loose Ends; so please stay tuned.

STEP 5: Just Relax! - "I commend the enjoyment of life", King Solomon EXHORTED ages ago, "because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life God has given him under the sun." Then Jesus Christ added, "Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labour or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendour was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you? Just Relax, my friend, for as long as you are driving within the SPEED LIMIT, while Believing in The Power Within, Cultivating The REAL Desire, Pursuing What Matters MOST, and Tightening Loose Ends, ALL you can and SHOULD do is Just RELAX. THIS is the 5th STEP of Making Things HAPPEN - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control - the FRUITS of the Holy Spirit outlined in Galatians 5:22. Besides, medical experts say this helps us to avoid those health complications that are mainly caused by worry, anxiety and fear of . . . what may never happen.

My friend, ONLY a few people WILL accomplish their GOALS and DESIRES in 2007, and we EXHORT you to be one of them. Besides we are WILLING to freely work with you one-on-one to ADOPT the LIFE STANDING GOALS of ENHANCING your Personality, ENERGIZING your Marriage, EQUIPPING your Parenting, ENRICHING your Spirituality, ENLIVENING your Relationships, and EMPOWERING your Career, as well as to carefully choose personal S.M.A.R.T. goals that are inline with your INNERMOST principles, rather than because they are the "in-thing". Discuss your GOALS with your spouse, children and close, respectable, friends in order to ensure that you are NOT biting more than you can chew. Finally, POST the typewritten New Year Resolutions and Goals in a conspicuous spot in your bedroom because researches indicate that those who write down their goals stand a GREATER chance of following, through as opposed to those that just "think" the goals in their heads. My friend, like Apostle Paul, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

As an organization, we are committed to releasing 6 Newsletters of Encouragement in 2007 to better EQUIP you in your lifelong journey. We also PLAN to facilitate a minimum of 5 Personal Effectiveness Workshops, 3 Marriage Enrichment Forums (May 26th, August 25th and November 24th) a Family Day Jamboree on July 14th, a Mighty Men Convention on November 3rd, a Mighty Women Convention, and for the first time, a Single Mom Conference and a Mighty Youth Rally. Most importantly, we remain committed to sharing our FAITH and dispensing ENCOURAGEMENT to millions worldwide, while aiming to increase the number of known recipients of Your Newsletters of Encouragement by a minimum of 5,000. And of course, to MAKE This HAPPEN, we WILL be using Our 5 Steps of Making Things HAPPEN, while LOOKING FORWARD to your SUPPORT by you FORWARDING this newsletter to your friends and families, and by you attending one of our numerous ENRICHING events. And if VOLUNTEERING is among your GOALS this year, we are currently seeking WILLING and ABLE volunteers as Motivational Speakers and Writers, Event Organizers and Helpers and Mentors for those seeking one.

My friend, these are by NO means 5 Steps to Heaven, BUT rather 5 VERY EFFECTIVE, SEQUENTIAL STEPS of Making Things HAPPEN in your life, including your innermost DESIRES to be more KNOWLEDGEABLE, more DISCIPLINED, more SPIRITUAL. At SOME intervals during the implementation of your GOALS, especially when Facing your GIANTS, you MAY need to REVERT back to Step 1 in order to quickly solidify your FAITH in GOD and in yourself, or you may JUST need to get more COMFORTABLE with Step 5. Nevertheless, unless the LORD builds the house, the labourer labours in VAIN. Whatever your goal and challenges, Apostle Paul assured us in his letter to the Corinthians that "God is faithful; he will not let us be tempted beyond what we can bear. And when we are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that we can stand up under it". According to God HIMSELF, speaking through Prophet Jeremiah, "I know the plans I have for you; plans to PROSPER you and not to fail you, plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will LISTEN to you. You will seek me and find me when you SEEK me with all your heart".



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Thank you for reading this newsletter! We rely on your feedback for encouragement, as well as to identify ways to better serve you. So please email your feedback directly to alex.ihama@theexhortation.com, and you will get a personalized reply within a few days. To have this exhortation delivered in-person to your organization or church, in either the form of a keynote speech or workshop, contact us. To register for Life Coaching or Business Coaching, click here

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The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential . . . these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence. Thus, follow not the path that life leads you, but rather blaze your own trail!

- Kong Fuzi (Confucius) 551 BC – 479 BC





While you may forward this on to inspire others too, your feedback means a lot to me. alex.ihama@theexhortation.com

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